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Summer
Jul. 20th, 2005
09:25 pm - HI
HI everone!
Have you even been so confused and feeling realy alone but you know that you are not. I have all of this stuff in my head and I can't get out.
If like have something on the tip of your tuge and you just can't get out. I feel like I need to go back 10 year of my life take back what I have now and just read everthing I can. but then I don't know if I could chech up to that. I wich with all my hart that I was smart. Even thought I feel this way and I and all I want to do is just be smart.
It is so nice be loved. I forget that I not smart and just not worth much, and just feel loved.
The other night. I went into sean room lad down on his bed and felt so at home. I feel like I can do anything I could fly with hem nest to me. He is my true north my true love my true everthing. If I loved hem anymore it would hart. I would give hem the world if I could. And I know if he could anything I need he would. I would give Hammer my life.
Love is truely amazing.
kinkis
confusedApr. 19th, 2005
11:51 pm - HI
HI everyone.
How is everyone. I hope good.
I have a bet of a problme I need your help. If you want to help. I am doing voice lesson with a women. She is raly nice and she trying to help me come out of my shell you can say. I think that lettle I was doing good. but something happen this week that I was very shy and I jus could not sing like I should off. Sometime that just happens to me. I don't know why. I wich I could jus sing and open up and sing. I know that I can. I don't know why I get so shy. And I did something that I should not have done. I asked her out, and she trend me down. That was fun. NOT! I don't know why. I am think that I am still upsit of Lee domeing me. It is hard she tust my soule in a way that I did not think posoble. I am trying to let it go. I am. I think that I just need time on that part. Soccty that I am doing my lesson with. I think that we are going to hang out for a while as frinds I think that my promble is that it is a teacher study reashipe and I get realy nevers around that kind of apmsfer. So I think that we might take a brack from the lesson and I need to do some sole sushing and preates by my self and she what I can do. and sing out infront of people. people that I am sared to sing infornt off. and that might. help me too. I don't know. I will see what happens. I don't know if I can be frinds with Lee I want to but it hard we someone is raching out to you and then all the sunde stops. She starts fliting and then I don't what to tusch you. I am trying at lest.
Welle I will stop talking and I hope everone is doing well I love you all.
Kinkis
:)
hopefulApr. 13th, 2005
09:42 pm - Drama
Hi,
Hi everyone. I am sorry that I have not written much but not to much has been happen in my life. Now lots of sutff is happening.
I got a grilfined She is amageing. But on Monday she brock up with me. I was with her for 3 weeks. I feel in love with her. She was my frist lover frist realy kiss frist realy date. I will never forget her. I know that if it is meat to me we will find each other agoin. I am sad that she is gone. but I hope that she will be happy, We are still good frinds.
I think that I have a nother gril inters in me. I not sure. I am just going to see what happes. So what ever happens happes.
Hammer has been so sweet lattly that I don't know what to do but injoy every mint. I don't know what has happend but I hope that it never goes a way. WOW. is all I can say. That is about all.
Love you all,
kinkis
PS. I hope that everone is doing welle, and that you are all as happy as I am.
amusedMar. 9th, 2005
11:28 pm - Feeling Weard.
Hi
Have you ever felt like you don't be long were ever you are? Have you ever felt like you just want to fly away from everthing and ever where. Just go and do think just leve and see if anyone care at all.
Not that I am saying that know one care. I just wich that I could fly away. Fly from all your problemes you have fly and just look at the world from a diffent places. go some where where no one has ever gone.
Be someone eles. Look like someone else. but if you look like someone eles would you realy be you. I don't even know what I trying to say or if I am making any sisons.
Have you ever had so many qouison and know awers? There are so many thinks in my head that I can't get out. don't know if I ever can. My be in my nest life. I hope in my nest life I will be smarter. I can only hope.
To night feel like I am someone eles I only wich I know who it was.
Who do you feel like to night.
Love
kinkis
weird11:16 pm - Bette
I was stading in front of my minore to night, after my bath. I was bresing my hair and thinking am I betteful? I kep asking my self over and over the same qouiston. Am I bettful? The only thing that I said is I don’t know. Still brithing my hair. Making difftent sitlles and Hoping on seeing something.. I the only thing that found that I did not like is my noes. I don’t like my noes I don’t think that I ever will. but we all have thikes that we don’t like about eath other. I wich that my nioice was smailler. I wich that I was thinker and so much more. A man named Soctt said that I am bettful but do I belive hem. I don’t know. Ever time that I see hem says you are so bettfule. mybe he know that I don’t belive that mybe he know something deep down in side that I don’t know. What do you think. Am I bettful? Love allways, Kinkis
lonelyFeb. 5th, 2005
11:17 pm - So in love
HI everone,
Do you ever wake up in the monning and know that you are ulitle unbleble happy and you know the prosne that you are nest to in the prons that you want to spend that rest of you life with. To day and every time that I am with Sean I wake up and look at hem looking at me and I see in his eyes. I cant help but be in love.
It is umazes that you could know what the other prons is thing. that when you need to be ruesd and knowing that you can reuge hem. Everytime that I live hem it gets harder and harder. it is so nice that I can be with someone that understands me and that I understand him. I love everthing about hem. I would not change a thing. I just wanted to rabe my arms around hem and ever let go. I hope everone can do if not now someday. Love is the greast thing on earth.
LOVE LOVE LOVE I AM SO IN LOVE
Love,
Kinkis
lovedJan. 28th, 2005
10:21 pm - OH MY GOD
Oh my god i just talk to TOOD LEGESD the most fames person in ice sazget to day. WOW. WOW.!!!!
I can't bive that I just talk to tood legege. I don't know what to do or what to thank. Wow.
My mom was there and my dad work at the save senter. and she then sacking. and she meet them sock his head and talk to hem and then harded her sell phone to me and I talk to tood legesd. Wow.
That is so cool.
Love,
Kinkis
happyJan. 25th, 2005
10:34 pm - Thank You
Thank you all for all your nice comments. I love you all. And I feel very loved. Thank you.
I hope that work will get better. We all have are bad days and we all have are good days. .
Love you,
Kinkis
goodJan. 21st, 2005
08:58 pm - Bad Day
HI everone.
I had a very bad and I need to talk. I hope that you don't mide. Beside of being bizzes all day long. I found something out or you could say sall somthiing that I did not like. I sall my bosse the man that I like at work. Bing pretetes agest people too. Or you could say a prons. I sall thim platley injoning a very nice black man tonight. A black man that I like very very much. he is one on the most nicested peolpe that i know. and my boss just went about his bezzes not even helple hem ever much at all and then getting mad at me for talking to hem so much. I don't think that I can work for a man like that.
that is not all. I acked very plinly to a proens that I work with his name is cory. If he could take care of a cutmer so that I could go and it was allready past time for me to go. Then he told in front of me my manger on duted at the time what I said. and it was a manger that does not like me too. She did not say anything. but still. I don't think that I ack much. I ually don't ask much from anyone I don't think. That is all for now. I think you for letting me vint on you. I kind of feel a lettle bit better.
PS I hope that everone is doing well.
Love you all.
kinkis
angryDec. 27th, 2004
10:39 pm - HI
Hi everone.
I don't realy mean to be a bich and complany to everone. But why can't everone just be nice to each other. I have noitces that everone in a group has there one thing about them. There is the bich the drama qouike the nered anywhere you get the picther.
I am the boled stuped one. I am kind of tired of that name. I know that I am not that smart but I don't like it when i am called bolded or if people acks me if I was born a blond.
I have to choges I can eather actept that I am the stubeted one of the group or I can do somthing about it. I am going to try my best to study and read as much as I can. so that I will not be the blond one of the group anymore. Sometime I don't mind to be colled that beuses I am just happy and everone should be happy. I love bing happy. it makes me feel good. and when I am happy I have noicters other people get happy to. So I am going to shere my happyiness with the world.
HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY!! HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY!!!
Love,
Kinkis
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